As I age, I seem more able to choose to tell the truth rather than hide behind comfortable falsehoods. But your article has me asking my self where delusions, denial and protection (through narrow concentration) still exist, and I see some areas lurking quite largely. Thanks so very much for the reminder.

The beauty of 12 Step Programs is their general premise, “I admitted that I was powerless over (alcohol, sex, others, etc.), that my life had become unmanageable.” Looking Cerberus straight in the eye and being willing to repeatedly see the truth, with humility (not humiliation) and understanding, in the company of others who share the same demons/secrets, is a great blessing. The stark power of honestly looking at one’s actions/thoughts with a mixture of accountability and compassion leads to growth and healing. Calling upon the help of one’s ‘Higher Power’ is akin to asking for the help of the Mighty Ones, Gods and Goddesses, and/or the Self. I don’t mean to put the small ’self’ in a demeaning place, because the small ’self’ has to be responsible ultimately one day at a time and to form a new habit of more skillful action/abstinence. To me, the small self and the Higher Power are in some kind of partnership, and grace becomes present when the Higher Power is sincerely sought to lead the small self out of the darkness of addiction. Or is the partnership an illusion?

I must admit that when thinking of addictions, I compartmentalize between the small self’s role and need to be responsible, and the knowledge that I am not a human being but part of the One Consciousness. The addiction becomes a compelling reason for me to relinquish my connection as the Self.